A blog of satire and blunt comedy provided by islanders with personal agendas based on the bible, fundamentalism, patriotism, statehood, backward morals, double standards, XIX century of "universal" values of freedom and liberty of expression, in a world where half its population can not read or write. Have no water, food or shelter, or work for peanuts.
Tuesday, June 28, 2011
Saturday, June 4, 2011
Tuesday, May 24, 2011
QUE TE PASO PUELTO RICO?
THIS is not good poetry at all, in the academic, living in the clouds like standards or any other you could think of/ bring/offer. Nevertheless, it is not puking like junior high school drop outs regueton from school or 12 1/2 +1/2 Street, chisel/sledge hammer, plus torch crafted images, bended like Beckman. It is crude and abrasive, the guay it demands. I decided If others can be proud of their shitty, lame poetry in blogs and books, I could do it to. Humble as I am without any pride, in any cliched shape, way or form.
I hate bad poetry, free verse or not. The worst book on the subject I have read is from a Puerto Rican woman with big teeth, either Pales or Matos Paoli wrote the foreword, in a classical subliminal style. She was into some Pachamama acid/mescaline trip while in Bolivia or such, and wrote some Mandarin like 'verses', so dull, I put the book in the waste basket. I am sixty, I have thrown away maybe five books in that time.
This 'poem' as my previous 'literary' performance, may have one or two good: words, sentences, ideas, concepts, verses and rhymes...But anything stated can be proved in a court of law or taking a stroll by yourself. ENJOY.
quel encanto mutilaron forrandote de asfalto/concreto
I hate bad poetry, free verse or not. The worst book on the subject I have read is from a Puerto Rican woman with big teeth, either Pales or Matos Paoli wrote the foreword, in a classical subliminal style. She was into some Pachamama acid/mescaline trip while in Bolivia or such, and wrote some Mandarin like 'verses', so dull, I put the book in the waste basket. I am sixty, I have thrown away maybe five books in that time.
This 'poem' as my previous 'literary' performance, may have one or two good: words, sentences, ideas, concepts, verses and rhymes...But anything stated can be proved in a court of law or taking a stroll by yourself. ENJOY.
QUE TE PASO PUELTO RICO?
Que te paso Puerto Rico
que te fuiteh barrancabajo?
Akeyoh que mah te kieren
como un ahko te han dejado.
Obselve dandome cuenta
jace tiempo en mi existencia
cuatro decadas tres lustros
lentamente en la conciencia
Al caminal pol San Juan
Santulce o Puelta e Tierra
lo evidente causa grima
Appalachia i Alabama
Michigan con su Detroit
Cabo Rojo i su Joyuda
sera la imagen de ayuda?
En lah calleh de San Juan,
Puelta e Tierra o Santulce
estructurah de concreto
profanadah sepulturah
Ni loh clavoh de la cruh
tuberiah ventanah pueltah
o el elestrico enramado
se le escapan al tecato
o chatarrero impoltado
Cuando sargo de la casa
del jaldin que sienta pautas
una ehtrustura abandonada
cada dohcientoh pasoh
no impolta que sea un piso
sean treh o sean cinco
Akelloh que van en auto
no ven ehto o ven akello
Toito leh parece bello!
En su bello Puelto Rico
Babelita de concreto chato
expresion de extrenhimiento
estetico ingenieroh i bankeroh
abogaoh i alkitestoh
quel encanto mutilaron forrandote de asfalto/concreto
Donde se jalla el encanto
del cliche mas repusnante?
Toito se desbarranco
medio siglo cuestabajo.
Llora llora Puelto Rico
tu flora i fauna immediata
embelecoh Donha Ineh
en los Altos de Trujillo
Corredores con Sierrucos en el noreste insular.
Llora llora Puelto Rico
como akelloh en Grana,
que se fueron siendo idos
para jamah regresah.
Ar She Melendez
Valualte Literario
Siempre le veo no lejos del Burger King en RIO, baluarte del IMPERIALIHMO YANKI,. Ehtrustura ehta que sobrevivio todo atake patriotico en los sesenta i setenta. Er She, sentado en los escalones de una libreria, solo, como solo el ehtara con su bisionaria bision grafica habiendo creado toda una teoria sobre deletreo que ocasionalmente utilizo en tributo a ehte kijote de la agria asfaltada patlia, en chancletah con una mielda ecabellera que mas parece ehcoba e vruja.
fin
Sunday, May 22, 2011
TRIBUTO MERECIDO A LA BLOGOSFERA BATATARIA INSULAR
EL SOBERANO YA CONOCE
NUESTRA TRAYECTORIA
de un lustro,
de un lustro,
en primera o tercera persona.
Ha llegado el momento de rendir cuentas, digo tributo a quien honor merece. Todos estos blogs incrustados o clavados si prefiere en las estrofas i versos chuecos son iconos del Puerto Rico patetico que me toca habitar, tolerar, haciendo un esfuerzo diario para mantener la perspectiva i el enfoque.
Ahora a reirse como puercos sordos si les parece.
a
Floka Olivieri
el nhame
por ser ellos mismos...
Un cabron que confundido
mirando la vida estaba
escribiendo en alta voz
con gringolas sin mordazas
Se despertaba de arena
con elco lao a su lado
poder cinco observaba
en el nhame debatian
el poder convocatorio
de sus obras literarias
No estaba soloel cabron
que confundio su vida miraba
alli ley la terrorista con cabo manuela*
esperaban que Isabel Caballer
que de acero sus ovarios
aceitara
Abruptamente aparecio de la
santa i negra manigua
mr cajan visitador testiculado
en titanio
para golpearles el cutis
con su verbo articulado
No os precupe si la rima
por momentos desentona
que esto no es siglo de oro
ni es modernista per se la obra
Aun faltan algunos
ire a la computadora
a refrescar la memoria
que no son tos los que estan
ya regreso en una hora
No he tardado mucho
encotrados casi todos
seguidores de nuestro heroe
que confundido
mirando la vida estaba
Mientras tanto...la prohibida i leycis ambas en la letrina quedamente meditaban en balbuceo indefinido sobre blasfemias i sus recuerdos
La magia descojonarse
le toco la mala suerte
llegaron de sopeton
chupatuercas a la letrina:
manolo matos i j.darko
el grunhon i gajonauta
alkarah jose hiran
cagalitroso con kaos
lyla y cabo manuela*
Nuestro universo insular
esta blogosfera boricua
solo falta BORINCANO el mas mamao
a mi juicio
con noticias positivas
barea mide seis pies
yo no sigo el baloncesto
para contagiar de alegria
Al cabron ali baba
que confundido mencionaba
bichos, cricas i condones
tetas, mierda i porquerias
Es admirado en otros pagos
como en la Cidra rural
poder cinco sin par
comparabanos un dia
El que confundio en feudos
del chicharon mirando la vida
estaba
el escribe tal cual habla afirma el
campesinado misionero
Antigonum por otro lado
cabalga en los oceanos
despidiendose de todos
Ahora ya podeir iros
para el pozo i el pendulo
que al cambiar un poco
el estres silabico
rimara con
el
esfinter.
Fin
Sunday, May 8, 2011
OUR FIRST ISSUE
FOR A LONG TIME, we have been studying the isle blog trends, in the process we discovered certain patterns of behavior and styles, registers, opinions, rather old, passe, reminders of those eggs in Alien, the movie. The people with these blogs utilize excessively information from daily local newspapers, television and radio.
MASTHEAD
The mock members of this imaginary, totally fictionalized editorial group are:
MASTHEAD
Minga del Fuego
Petraca Kon Blinders
La Malanga
Alcoholado Sup 70
Coger en Cinco
Puercorico pa toel mundo
Lets take from the first and second in the masthead, since they are exchangeable, their views predictable, dictated as by the inquistion. No juan will notis. These are four posts found today not verbatim. One was deleted.
Del fuego posted a story about lazy lions and the working female of the species. She delivers, raise the kids and takes some time to hang out with the kids in the evening. Can not see the connection, maybe you do. It ends with: Happy Mothers Day.
If one is not a bible freak, you would have noticed that in Puercorico half of the women with children are single mothers on welfare.
The second did something rare, Petraca Kon Blinders or PKB from now on. This character in a senility trance posted Sunday morning about how The Godfather, were such a great movie. Never mind Italian mafia is not the best USA has to offer culturally,however, no specifics were offered.
Photography, acting, directing, script, music score and so forth.
Photography, acting, directing, script, music score and so forth.
On top, the unevenness in this trilogy, for the educated viewer of the trilogy was not mentioned either. The one about the Pope and ROME stunk, big time. Later, in the evening, after a change of mind it was deleted, Maybe recognizing it was not a good time or being out of range, perhaps..Sin embargo on Monday it was back on stage, god knows why...unless I, your humble servant, is the senile academic one.
It was substituted by, "Songs my mother taught me" by Dvorak". Exquisite!! exclaimed Reggie, the blogger, a regular. This from a "communist" as feline autonomists are known among people and populace. Not 'Mi Madre" by Jector Lavoe, or the similar crap by Ismael Miranda, juat kind of patriotism is this? Prior to this is was Pachelbel, Juanes, Olga Tanhon and Black Angels.
Juat a repertoire.
Moving forward...Coger en cinco or CEC:In kinder garden one learns to learn. The education system is not centralized. Lunch for teachers is paid. In Finland.
All these under the tittle: Autonomy is fundamental to improve education.
Next time soon: La Malanga, that stiff, dull, hemorrhage of superlative 'humor', joy, happiness and laughs, inspired and limited to the description of this new blog, with plenty of fans, and the other two will be covered. We will, in the third person plural visit that ridiculous blog of HUMOR. We have never been able to see it no matter how jard we tried.
Nevertheless, one thing is certain. For the last five years the MASTHEAD VI have been scratching each other backs monkey like, laughing at each other jokes chit chat wise in the comment section, no matter how lame and trivial.
Not only that, they look at the dogs balls,or testicles, as CEC would prefer,(as when he wrote about not PEOS/PEOH, but pedos, cabron), calling it the male of the species. Only after watching local television, listening to the radio or reading the newspapers. The whole bunch of them.
We do not know how long this humorous blog will exist, considering we do have relevant things to say/write/plant and propagate, without any intention to change anyjuan or believing we have the bull grabbed by the scrotum or the pan by the handle. Or to become moral judges about sensitivity, politically correctness or moral standars based on testaments.
To kick butt is our mission/vocation, Gabriel the archangel, not Peter, was the messenger in a dream. Now in a much more relaxed manner, less stern and grouchy. All love and smiles.
To kick butt is our mission/vocation, Gabriel the archangel, not Peter, was the messenger in a dream. Now in a much more relaxed manner, less stern and grouchy. All love and smiles.
We hope the people/populace, the low/high cultural segment in the concret/asphalt isle will appreciate this really humorous effort. The thousands of fans in the Caribbean and five continents according to Feedjit, will continue to do so.
REMEMBER:
To pass away blogging is to live forever.
FLOKA OLIVIERI bilingual legend
from the west and honorary member of the
MASTHEAD VI
Words of Wisdom or
Palabras con luz.
Ahi noh miramoh en telcera pelsona.
l
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